COVID19; Marriage/family at a vantage position bY EZEKIEL ADEWALE FATOMILOLA

Of all times in the history of mankind, these are more than ordinary when talking about times and seasons. The good news is that, for every season under the Heavens, end always comes.

Stay home and be safe, says the principle of survival during this time. Wash your hands and avoid contact with your eyes. As a people, we all need one another during and when these times are over.

While many sad aspects of this event are being paged and screened on all media platforms, I bring one of the many good news of it all. COVID19 has put the family, marriage and all related institutions at a vantage position.

Hold on, let me bring it to you in a second. When was the last time you spent a whole day with your family? I mean before the advent of Covid19? You probably can’t recall. Long ago, if we would not deceive ourselves, it is certain that not in the history of you been a parent have those kids seen their father on days other than Sunday and public holidays. I’m sure on those days, it was not a complete day spent with them. If I am not mistaken, it was when you guys were dating you probably joined your wife in the kitchen or help with house chores. Even those are subject to your belief system, you probably had done it to show her you are a repentant archaic man.

How is it not an enough adulation due to Mr. Coronavirus? This disease has probably forced millions of fathers to see their children everyday. At least, if the fear of contracting the virus will not make many men stay back with their families, the fear of being whipped by military men has ensured the stay home, stay safe mantra suffices.

Look, if I would be honest with you, this is the time to host that long due retreat. I don’t mean the one you lord yourself as the head of the family oooo. I mean a retreat where every member of the family will have a sense of belonging and those kids will look you in the face and tell your shortcomings as a father!

This is the time to revisit the family roles you and your wife agreed before the kids were brought forth. Being a father is not in the donation of sperm or paying fees, picking them from schools, carrying them to the playing ground, reading and explaining rhymes to them are part of the duties of a father.

It is also the time to show your wife real romance, I mean the dirtiest one you can think of. For instance, when last did you eat the something? LOL. Who told you she is not good in bed? Have you shown her? Did you read books on eating the punny to her? I mean, grow up man! Honestly, let us make the family work again. Covid19 was probably bestowed on us to ensure that this 8-5 thing separating most lovers and putting asunder families is given a break.

How long we would stay home is unsure, government giving the orders can’t tell, health workers can’t tell and no one except the virus knows. However long it lasts, this is the time to SAVE THE FAMILY. Lots of couples were living as flatmates. Now is the time that we made these Marriages work!

I understand that many abusers too will seize this moment as ample opportunities to deal with their “Difficult” partners. I am saying, give it a try to reach out to me. I have a team of clinicians who are going to render free services to you this period. I mean FREE OF CHARGE. To love is everyone’s duty, to be loved however is also everyone’s birthright.

It was never in God’s agenda that two people fall in love and grow out of love. Those vows you shared at the altar before men and God were meant to be executed and I will help you live them. I need you to show some level of willingness. Covid 19 is an ample opportunity to build your broken home. Don’t look for a way out of your family, rather look for a way that will help your family out of the shackles of hatred, lack of love and depression you have grown into as a result of your love for your career, job and ends meet. Love and career aren’t meant to compete with each other, you made it so.

Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

At least, It is clear now that every other thing is not as important as your well being and when your marriage works, your family will gain strength, your children will succeed at school and ultimately your performance will improve at work and your income will increase. This is not time to nag, I understand that there may be reasons to wail, but this relationship needs your investments and you must be deliberate. Invest this time at home to make your marriage work.

Reach out today via Maritalpsychologist@gmail.com or visit https://maritalpsychologist.wordpress.com/wp-admin/edit.php?post_type=feedback to fill the form. A Marriage counselor will be in touch and should you need a clinician, one will be attached to you for free immediately.

In these trying times, you need your wife/husband and those kids need you both. Make the best of this time and remember to follow us on Instagram/Facebook andTwitter @easycare77 @Maritalpsychologist or Ezekiel Adewale Fatomilola.

My name is Ezekiel Adewale Fatomilola and I have learnt that love is not given to us, ready made, we must mold the clay we have been given to the design we mentally picture to have that befitting love life we will be eventually proud of!

Most importantly,remember, together we will beat this Coronavirus!

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